/December 28, 2018.
I am too lazy to fill in all the details but on the 18th I made my first venture out of my 4 walls when a friend picked me up and took me to the hospital and to the ATM and to the pharmacy and to a supermarket. Wow. Freedom. I appreciate how the animals must feel in the zoo, round and round and round for your whole bloody life. Suicide would be a serious temptation.

I have had challenges with BM's, BP's, and sleeping but things are working out.
I refused to take the sleeping pills and went cold turkey and didn't sleep for 6 days. Wide awake. The withdrawal symptoms are: insomnia, muscle spasms, sweating, and dry, dry mouth and throat. I started taking half the dose, and quit that last night. It is hard to say what is hallucination, dreaming, or wishful thinking but I feel that I am slowly but surely winning the battle, but I am bloody tired.

Lots of visitors over the holidays, lots of food and sweets, etc. These gifts I feel ok to share with others, especially those who have very little or nothing. We are over-blessed and sometimes don't appreciate it or ever recognize it.

Today, I drove for the first time since before the op. Only as far as the hospital and convent, maybe one mile. 5 minutes. IT seems ok to me.

I want to share this from Sr. JOan Chittister with you. She is a prophetess in our Church and in general.

So, have a relatively happy new year, with all the things you will need to cope and even grow in 2019, like love, patience, courage, strength, hope, determination, and good friends, as you are to me.


I can't find it now. I will send it later. good night.  Cas.

Dec. 14, 2018.12.14

     It is tomorrow now, about 11:40 before lunch. I want to start at the beginning for anyone who missed out on anything. I tried with WhatsApp this morning but after a few lines it just disappeared and I was not happy (an understatement). So, I will start with this blog first and then see how to get it to people with WhatsApp.

Oct. 20---I start having spasms of my left let and foot. Every 15 seconds. 24/7. It  is now night and it isn’t stopping.

Oct. 21---I phone our doctor who says he will try to get an appointment with a neurologist.

Oct. 22---failed to get an appointment with Dr. Wolpe (full) but try our luck anyway via outpatient. No luck. See Dr. Maharajh instead but he is not a neurologist.

Oct. 25---through a friend manage to see Dr. Wolpe. He says I have Babinski reflex—when you run something up the bottom of the foot, if the reaction is the big toe going down, that is good. If the big toe goes up, that means that there is something wrong with the nerves—brain, spine, something. He says and writes a letter saying the I need URGENTLY an MRI (Scan).

Oct. 29---We finally manage to get an MRI and it shows that there is a blockage of a bunch of nerves in the spinal column. Right now it is only affecting the nerves going down to the left leg and foot. It will, if left to continue, wind up in something serious, with other nerves, like total paralysis. Very expensive.

Nov. 5---We manage to see Dr. Van der Merwe, a neurosurgeon, with enough towards the operation to book a date.

Nov. 16---Operation date, report to hospital at 6am. (this is Friday). I remain in the hospital for 5 days being checked each day and being forced to get up and walk, with the physiotherapist, each day, including going up and down stairs. The fifth day is Nov. 20, but the Dr. never comes around till late in the afternoon so I have to wait till the

Nov. 21---release, have to walk out of the hospital on my own steam but taught how to get in and out of bed without spoiling the job. Try to walk as much as possible and do the exercises the physio taught me. Only standing, no sitting, and lying down. I’ll be back later.

Nov. 28, 2018---Up till now while I have been back from the hospital, I have been eating my meals standing up and switching off walking with my 4 legged walker inside and outside, watching TV occasionally, and often, on my back, studying the ceiling of my room. I know every crack and shadow by heart. And, I have no energy. I try to put something in my blog but after 2 minutes, I give up. I get lots of WhatsApps, asking how are you, how’s the pain, are you getting better, do you sleep alright, etc. etc. etc. I can’t answer them all and just give up, mostly, dealing with the whatsapps and calls. I check the news on BBC, Al Jazeera, CNN and other sources but get tired of hearing about Brexit, Cohen, Trumps tweets, etc. But, In the meantime, I realize that I have not had a bowel movement Since before I went into the hospital, That’s almost 2 weeks. So I take a laxative (this is the 27^th) and wait. Nothing. SO I take more laxative, still nothing, then, in desperation, I take a super dose, (in the meantime, I haven’t been able to urinate either). Then, it happens. The poor little care giver, a young thing, has to deal with 6 or 7 male nappies, full, but still not an empty system. There were big plans for celebrating my birthday, the 28^th of Nov. but it turns out to be the shittiest day in my life. The whole day up till 9:15 at night. I have sent out an SMS to one of our brothers who is a nurse that I need something to shut this thing off. I spent most of the day sitting on the pot and expelling most of what had gathered up over the last two weeks. ( don’t laugh). Finally, I said let’s have one last try and, whoosh, out it comes, like a landslide and what a relief. Also, I suddenly am able to urinate (about 4 quarts). It seems that the full colon was pressing on the ureter and blocking the urine from flowing. Happy Birthday. Nothing like my 80^th. (Katrina)

I have had several BM’s since then but not quite back to normal. The first one was the result of drinking gallons of water and eating over a dozen prunes. It works. All natural. Hooray.

 Nov. 28 to Dec. 12

Lots of visitors. Some problems with blood pressure, which is something new for me. It is still there but we are trying to calm it down. I have run out of my medication so I had the Doctor send a new scrip which includes a sleeping pill that works much better than the first time, so the sleeping is pretty good.I’ve been sitting too long. I have to take a break.

Dec.13,2018---D day

This was my first appointment with the surgeon since the operation (for you medical people---decompression and spinal fusion). He was happy with the results and the progress. I can now sit on a chair (preferably hard) for 20 minutes at a time. I should not drive before 6 weeks. (that would be Dec. 27 ---six weeks from the operation. I will have another meeting with him on Jan. 17^th and he will send me to another physio (did he say khineticist?) to teach me some new exercises. I walk with a cane and often just move off forgetting the cane. I have no trouble walking and still no pain. Maybe it is still to come. I have been eating with the community and it was good to have company while eating. I keep eating my prunes and will also add some other dried fruits to keep the bulk (fiber) doing its job.

Lots of love to you all and thanks for all the prayers. They have been my greatest support. God bless you all. Fr. Cas.

  

Dec. 13, 2018

Today is the day when I met the neurosurgeon for the first time since the operation. ( That was on Nov. 16) In between I have been very lethargic, not feeling like using the computer (having to stand up to type) or even answering the phone or responding. I just couldn’t, for the most part, be bothered. But today, I got the news that I have (WE HAVE) been waiting for. But it is almost bed time for me and I will fill you in on all the latest information tomorrow, I promise. I have to overcome this lethargy. Good night.

Nov.27,2018

Wow.Two crucial weeks have gone by. I have to stand to type and keep my balance at the same time. So this won’t be long.

The operation was on Friday the 16^th. There were people who wanted to visit me that same afternoon. Ha I was zonked till the next afternoon. Like a zombie. No pain. I was given instructions by my physio on the 17^th now to get in and out of bed. On the 18^th we even learned how to climb stairs. I think that the doctor was impressed . If you don’t pass that test you don’t get out of the hospital.

I was told that Tuesday, the 20^th would be discharge day. However, the doctor had a full schedule of ops and didn’t get there till late on that afternoon. No discharge,

Wednesday, the 21^st, he kept his promise and after learning how to get dressed (with help, keep that back straight) It was about 11:30 when we were at last leaving but definitely not before paying a afew more bills that had accumulated in the meantime.